when.i.get.where.i'm.going.

look up

2012-01-30T07:58:00.000-08:00

cause every second i breathe, yes, You are here.

every step i take,

every word i say,

every moment i'm alive, yes, You are always here.

i don't know maybe i am the one who feel this feeling.

confused,wondering why and how.

it's seem i just play with my own brain. puzzle. it's maze.

where i must go out from this? i don't know whether it's only my crazy thinking or it's a fact, a pathetic fact that i know, surely i must walk on it.

i wondering why, and i always ask God in my sad pray, but You always remembering me, You know the best of what You given to me. this my life. whole of my life.

i don't know God, really where i am supposed to do? hide? cry? pretend? forget all the things? and i don't want to care about anything? please let me know before it's too late.

i don't want become like this. and i know You don't want i have this thought. but surely, this is the max so i can't pretend that everything in my thought is still right.

God, tell me , with your remarkable way, i don't want grow up with the same of me now. show me the chance God, and if i'd already pass it before i had realized it, i'm sorry, and please give me another chance to be new me.

But, if You want i still like i am now, so, let me just perish my thought so i can smile and be free. this is my petition to You, God.

God, You always tell me to believe in You, for everything that happened, for my future, for the things that i like and i want to be in, for Your promise, for Your guidance, for Your words, for Your wish, for Your plan, for Your amazing grace. it's seem to easy, and i know i must. but in the reality, now i know i must struggle to believe in You, cause how do i live without You? i know You never let me go, and i want keep holding Your hand in every way i step.

i know this is my choice and my life

2012-01-25T09:37:00.000-08:00

Why love must be so hard?
it's just like climbing the mountain, get tired, shed the tears.
but i still hope because i know love is never ending. still struggle and empower me to have a better life.

When i choose, i know there's many reason and boundaries which separate you and me.
but will i and my choice still forever? it's a mystery of us.
i don't want to think so far of what people say about. i just want to walk. it's wrong?

the meaning of smile

2012-01-24T06:09:00.000-08:00

ceritanya dulu januari tanggal berapa lupa, hehe, aku sm temenku pergi ke TA terus ke golden terus nemenin temenku itu pulang naek bajaj. hehe. nah, temenku itu pengennya 6rb sampe rumahnya, emang menurutku juga 6rb udah paling pas hehehe. bajaj kesatu, bajaj kedua, sampe entah bajaj keberapa, udah lumayan malem pula kita berdua nawar2 bajaj. hehe. dari yang biasa aja sampe yg bbg itu loh haha. sayangnya gak ada yang mau 6rb. :( mana pula bapak bajaj nya banyak yang judes2.

akhirnya muncul deh bajaj biasa yang jalannya itu super lelet ke tempat kita berdiri. temenku nawar seperti biasa, sebutin alamat rumahnya, terus nawar 6rb. kalo bapak2 yang laen dengan muka emosi ato langsung nolak pergi, bapak yang satu ini nyengir2, ah jangan segitu deh, tambah seribu lagi seribu aja jadi 7rb. hehe. aku sama temenku liat2an hehe, aku tau pasti dia bingung dan mikir apa 7rb aja ya gpp. hehe. karena sang bapak yang memelas dan senyum, akhirnya temenku naek bajaj yang itu deh hehe :)

inti dari ceritanya, jangan lupa banyak2 senyum kalo bisa pasang tampang memelas :)
hahaha, bukan, maksudnya banyak2 senyum, karena hati yang gembira adalah obat!

this is my indonesia

2012-01-17T02:41:00.000-08:00

Senang senang akhirnya selesai juga latian nyetir di deket rumah. pt ulisa, kata bapak sopir, universitas lima satu. haha. itung2 udah 6 jem kali latian dan lumayan lah tetep kagokan dan panikan. haha. untungnya udah dapet sim juga, hehe, jadi ceritanya jumat tanggal 13, aku ke polda di dan mogot, abis tes tertulis yang aku isi dengan asal-asalan, bahkan pas ditanya mau ambil sim a ato sim b aja aku melongo. haha. ternyata sim a buat mobil, sim c buat motor, olala.

kita di bawa ke lapangan terbuka. keren deh ada tanjakan, ada tikungan dkk, kesannya serem aja ya kalo bakal di tes satu-satu. tapi aku nyadar itu gak mungkin, yang di tes aja bisa tua nungguin nya, soalnya yang mau dapetin sim itu luar biasa banyak, hehe, apalagi polisinya yang ngawasin, kata pak inspekturnya malah begini, "pasti semuanya kepengen lulus kan ya? tanpa tes segala, kalo kita tes ini sampe besok buka toko juga belom selesai." bener juga sih, yang laen mah pada ketawa-tawa sama mengiyakan, tapi dengan senyum miris, pikiran aku "gini nih indonesia." mungkin buat para bapak-bapak ibu-ibu senior kaya ini biasa ya. haha.

dan bapak yang ngaku suaranya serak-serak itu bilang, "yaudah saya kasih tips2 kamu ngendarain dijalan ya. cara mengatasi kecelakaan beruntun." cara apa lagi gitu dua lagi aku lupa. aku cuma inget yang terakhir "sama ini yang paling penting cara ngindarin polisi." lagi-lagi rame bener suara ibu-ibu bapak-bapak pada teriak-teriak setuju. aku cuma senyum kecil "lagi-lagi, gini nih indo." haha. tinggal pencet gas kenceng-kenceng ya? abis itu kabur. hehe.

tapi ada hal-hal menarik yang buat aku luar biasa. kita patuhi lalu lintas bukan karena kita takut sama polisi, takut ditilang, takut sim di sita haha, kata bapak polisi, itu tuh semua hubungannya sama nyawa. "nyawa Anda berharga kan? gak mau kalian itu menyia-nyiakan nyawa kalian dijalan. apalagi di rumah pasti ada orang-orang terkasih yang menunggu Anda pulang." keren banget ya kata-katanya. betul betul betul.

terus si bapak juga bilang, "biasain deh kalo mau pergi ke kantor ato kemana tuh sediain waktu setengah jem lebih awal supaya pas di jalanan gak keburu buru dan ngebut nerobos lampu merah." nah ini juga nih langsung cep nancep, untung selama ini aku naek kendaraan dianter ato gak naek angkot hehe, kalo mobil sendiri bisa terbang kali. maklum pas-pasan mulu kalo mau pergi ke mana-mana. haha. makanya setiap kali kepepet enaknya tuh naek motor dan dibonceng ngebut. haha. tapi itu bahaya.

lalu di akhir pidato nya, si bapak bilang, "demi nama bangsa Indonesia, kalian semua dinyatakan lulus." tepuk tangan dari bapak-bapak ibu-ibu. sorak sorai. aku cuma diem, bingung. walaupun pada akhirnya aku juga tau bakal dilulusin semua, tapi keren aja ya bawa-bawa nama indonesia.

more than billon people in the earth, but here i am

2012-01-16T08:42:00.000-08:00

Do you ever realize?

God create so many many people in this world. one? ten? hundred? thousand? million? billion? i don't know but so many, and i can't count it.

And then, God create with the differences one by another. i am not you, and you are not me. because one thing, we are different.

Every people with different wish, different dream, different physical, different culture, diffrent belief, different hobby, different imagination, different feel.
and God really know the best right?
so whenever i can't be someone else, He still give chance to be my self.
to like everything that is free.
from the simple to the wonderful thing that i love and love so:
sleeping. eating. cooking.
singing. playing. cycling.
reading. writing. drawing. coloring. capturing. thinking.
dreaming. walking. standing. traveling. watching.
seeing the world.
seeing the cloud.
seeing sunset.
seeing fireworks.
getting idea. getting my dreams.
forgiving. praying. loving.

i want to be my best, and also every people want to be the best of them.
because this is still the start of 2012, get your dreams, and start to step your and my little step.

i don't know what the future i will get, and i know i am not the best over billion people in this world, and not the better than them. when i see people that have a great talent, really amazing and i envy sometime, but i will try to get my step, step by step until the end of my age. because every people always say, "learning until the end. there is no word too late to get what you want and you dreams." so please God, be with me, and lead me to the thing i love and i dreams, but as usual, it will be as You wish.

when today is 16 december

2012-01-16T07:58:00.000-08:00

When i believe i can, God will makes it true.

I don't want be another, i just want be me.

I pray with my heart so i believe God is in my heart.

I love You, God, so i try to love the other. My family, my friend and also my self.

I want to watch every wonderful life, made by You, God. And if You permitted me, i want be the one of them.

people say "happy new year"

2011-12-31T09:53:00.000-08:00

THANK YOU LORD, for the new year :)
about 2012 is now.

if 2011 is already passed and i still have a chance to have and pass the 2012, it's so amazing.
for the sins that i'd done in the past, let it pass away, so that i will make the new and better will be.
for the tears that i'd dropped in the past, make it just a natural of someone life, so i will be stronger than before.
for the hug from my mother and my sister, i will remember it always, i hope we have a harmonious family, because it's our big dream, right?
for the smile and laugh that appeared on my lip, i say it's Your kindness for me.
for the love, You've given to me, i pray gratefully.
for the anger, i was sorry if i had hurted You and forgive me and remind me to be patient.
for the healthy and illness,
for the weak and strong,
for when i was rich or poor,
for when i was confuse or sure,
for when i was down or up,
for when i was nothing or something,
for when i could make someone's happy or sad,
for the loneliness and togetherness,
for the praise and indignity,
for the rain and sun,
for the morning and night,
for the fireworks this night,
for the family and home,
for me and my prayer,
for everybody's prayer, the hope for 2012.

just make me get a chance to pass and walk on this year.
for everything, smiles and tears, silent or shouted, walk or run, fall and wake, hug or hide, sleep or awake, study or play, dream and fact, friend or enemy, eat or diet, go forward or go back, struggle or surrender, manage or be influenced, love and be loved.
choose it! i choose it, or You choose it for me, please :)

i say it again "welcoming 2012!"

2.0.1.2

2011-12-29T11:17:00.000-08:00

2012 is coming soon.

i'm know nothing on 2012.

nothing about my family.
nothing about my future.
nothing about my life.
nothing about love.
nothing about study, i can still defend or not.
nothing about the kindness and the badness.
nothing about crying and laughing.
nothing about the progress, i will be a better person or not.
nothing about always be with You or not.
nothing about friendship, it will be continue or not.
nothing about my seriousness be Your servant.
nothing about my mind.
nothing about everything that i am going to see.
nothing about everything that i will feel.
nothing, really is nothing.
because i know next year is a mystery, nobody know it, nobody can guess it.
and tomorrow is still mystery.
for that, so i'm begging to You, for Your kindness and love to a pity and pathetic life.
so whatever the 2012 is walking, i still can be strong, and i hope You still want walking:
with me,
with this fragile country,
with my small family that i hope it will be beloved family,
with my lovely people that i love and miss them,
for the time toward 2012.
because in the name of Jesus Christ we pray, amen.

what's a dream inside?

2011-12-29T10:48:00.000-08:00

when i have a JOURNEY of my life, i hope i'd just pass the J so that i still have O-U-R-N-E-Y to pass, and there's no "LATE" for me to do my best.

what should i do for my life?

i don't know really.
i need time and Your kindness to plan my life.
i don't know what i am going to be.
what's my dream.
what's my plan for my later day.
i don't know when i decided to study at untar and take design, but i don't think i am properly to take design.
not creative enough.
i don't know, but please God, give me strength to prove and pass this way, because i'd already chosen it.
semester 2 i'm coming kalo lulus, amin.

i like this song really :)

When I get where I'm going
on the far side of the sky.
The first thing that I'm gonna do
Is spread my wings and fly.

I'm gonna land beside a lion,
and run my fingers through his mane.
Or I might find out what it's like
To ride a drop of rain

(Chorus:)
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
there'll be only happy tears.
I will shed the sins and struggles,
I have carried all these years.
And I'll leave my heart wide open,
I will love and have no fear.
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
Don't cry for me down here.

I'm gonna walk with my grandaddy,
and he'll match me step for step,
and I'll tell him how I missed him,
every minute since he left.
Then I'll hug his neck.

(Chorus)

So much pain and so much darkness,
in this world we stumble through.
All these questions, I can't answer,
so much work to do.

But when I get where I'm going,
and I see my Maker's face.
I'll stand forever in the light,
of His amazing grace.
Yeah when I get where I'm going,
Oh, when I get where I'm going,
there'll be only happy tears.
Hallelujah!
I will love and have no fear.
When I get where I'm going.
Yeah when I get where I'm going.

move on. make a step. walk. run. if fall, get up. walk. run.

2011-12-26T11:29:00.000-08:00

if i always make you angry i'm sorry. i want to be patient to you.
i want prove what i have to prove. and i didn't give you anything that make you smile.

i know you always sad and worry about anything else, about your life, your mind, and you always says it to me many times. i'm sorry if i can't listen all. i'm sorry if i can't be a good listener for you, and i can't give you good advice, too. because i'm so tired to listen it, and my ears can't close not to listen any words you spoke. i can't. so must i go far away just for have a peace?

if my sisters only stay at their place, when they saw you and him make a high voice, i said i can't. and never can. i will hide and i always hide.

i have a dream to have a happy family, and i know every family wants it. you and him. i have a dream to live alone when i was graduated from high school. really. and maybe from three of us, i'm the most want it. but, You God, have a different plan, and maybe i'm so selfish to think that she broke my dream. i am wrong? and she is right?

Is You God give me a really sensitive heart? so i will be so strange. really. i am like a boat. so easy to smile and cry. easy to angry and laugh. easy to silent and talk much. easy to confess my fault and sins and easy to do it again. easy to be offended, and please God, teach me to forgive. easy to feel nothing. what i'm now is it the best of Your plan?

Forgive and forget all the things in the past, and make a new. it's a christmas meaning. this christmas is different from last christmas. i didn't make promises to You God, what things that i want to change. maybe because i know, what i say to You God it's vain, nothing change, and i still the same or maybe worse. so what i must to do? maybe You so lazy to hear and listen me for the promises that i always say it and it never happen. so i'm sorry God. but what the sorry meaning? nothing?

move on. just walk on and maybe someday i will find the better of me. leave the past and i will start the new. so hard God, just to make one smile for my mother, just to make a laugh for my father, because all things i made is only anger and sadness.

fly away. i hope i can. just feel the wind and i dream like i'm flying in the sky. seeing Your beautiful clouds, and guess what form that You make. playing a kite. sitting on rock. seeing snow. listening music.

walking on the maze life. it's the hard part. but please remember me, God, everything i'll do is for You. i'm just ride in this world, and i will return it back to You one day. so make my life worth and precious.

what the meaning of anger? so i don't want to enforce my will, just stop and be silent. no need to be win, if i just made her hurt and You hurt and then i feel nothing, a child that never make a smile for her family.

if my sister write a blog, she says she want every person who reads her blog get something useful or make them learn from something that she wrote. but i'm not. i write every words that i can't explain, every words that i can't say, everything what i feel, everything in my mind and heart that maybe only me know or maybe i don't know also.

before-after 25.12.11

2011-12-26T11:06:00.000-08:00

22.12.11
No bravery to explain what i feel. sorry. i prove it at night. but it was nothing maybe for you, we always like this?

23.12.11
Busy with my self, fix the christmas tree, looking for the decorations for christmas and do it alone.

24.12.11
be angry. get conflict. lie. cry. want to give you something one day before christmas. i got what i must got and it's all because of me. only one in my bedroom. laying in my bed. eat the bread that i bought an hour ago. seeing the christmas tree. seeing the light. pray to God. christmas was broken caused me. i'm sorry.

25.12.11
Go to church, pray and sing, sorry. Merry christmas. eat. take picture. i realized something when i was at church, so sad.

26.12.11
always have conflict. cook. sing. and i miss You. remember that "if you pray about something you want to be, God will give that day with problems so that you can be want you want to be." i'm so far from You. i want to be patient. really. help me God.

2011-12-21T21:50:00.000-08:00

So that tell someone that you love,
just what you're thinking of,
if tomorrow never comes.

what a night means to me

2011-12-08T06:54:00.000-08:00

That night, i was looking for something. something beautiful and i wish i could find it.

That night. i was walking on the street, seeing everything and seeing the light, make me wonder that that was night of wonderful light.

That night, i was thinking in my bedroom about everything that i just passed.

That night, i was seeing the moon, and hope there was stars too.

That night, i planned to staying outside all night, listened the sound of fireworks, and i would be really happy.

That night, i went outside with him, and her, just for seeing fireworks, so beautiful.

That night, i set the christmas tree and prayed to You for amazing christmas and for my promises to You.

That night, i heard they shouted and i just could pray and hide.

That night, i was listening to her story and try to strengthen her and also crying with her.

That night, i was talking to her, talked about our dreams and hoped someday it will be true.

That night, i was crying alone, and i was sure that You heard me, and i would be better.

That night, i was thinking of you and i hope you was fine.

That night, i shouted in my heart, where are You, God? But i know You are always in my heart.

That night, i stayed to do my homework and i was happy you accompany me.

That night, i was with you.

That night, i wasn't alone.

That night, i felt a happiness.

That night, i missed her.

That night, i prayed.

That night, i saw her and hope she will be fine, always.

That night, i talked to him, only a short word but i know he was happy and i was too.

That night, i received a message from him and i was smiling, he was apprehensive of me.

That night, i was dreaming.

That night, i was walking outside to seeing fireflies.

That night, i was joking with her, saying that i love her, and i was laughing.

That night, i was sleeping.

That night, i was happy when i know that she bought me my favorite food.

That night, i was grateful to God, for every moment that already happened along that day.

That night, You made a new journey about my life.

can i strengthen you?

2011-11-29T08:37:00.000-08:00

It's hard to explain my self, and my mind, yours and others.
It's hard to choice, but i really know that I've already choose it.

Lord, let me be wise, so i can listen to her, and i will do my best for her.
Just make me sure about Your kindness for her, and i believe You will, and i will wait for that time.
As You wish.
Make a smile on her lips. But surely i know, i must give her strength to support her. but really it's hard, only silent and i say it's hard, how can i give her strength and give her a hug? i think it's the best way, but i didn't do it. where is my bravery?

And for him too. I don't know everything about him, but i always pray for him, i hope it's always forever. but, my dream is want to see you smile, be happy. i can't understand you, and maybe you can't understand me. we are not close by each other. but, believe me, i want you to smile and may Lord listen to my dream.

I don't know, really don't know. Who is right, who is wrong. why this always happen? just a few moment i see a smile, but, it's seems a long time, to see anger and disappointed. where is the love? i ask to listen to your heart, and maybe you will see it?

I'm here alone, seeing you, and i need to see a happiness, please, just a moment and i can dreaming about something that i really want to see and feel. nothing impossible, right? so, it's not too strange that i will wait it, and if i need to do something, please Lord give me the bravery so i will do something useful for you.

Just remember how i was, and we were. and i hope i will see the future, seeing you smile, listening every amazing words, feel that this is we are supposed to be, because this is home, and i hope it will be the best home ever.

and you always remember the smiles!

2011-11-24T05:35:00.000-08:00

hari ini pagi yang udah lumayan membuat sebel, hehe, jadi tugas kemaren belom kelar, dan udah gw tinggal tidur, hehe.. ya gapapa, ud ngantuk amat sangat hehe.. trus pagi2nya, pada ribut soal kecil, nganterin gw sampe halte busway. :( biasa, padahal kn bisa toh jalan terus naek angkot ke halte busway, hehe, ampe jadi pada emosian gitu tadi pagi. dan akhirnya gw dianterin ke halte busway itu hehe.

sesampenya di halte busway sawah besar, cepet sih lumayan dapet busway nya, tapi empet2an seperti biasa. terus gw turun pas di harmoninya deh. ngantri yang ke arah kalideres, hehe, dan lamaaa banget busnya gak dateng2 juga haha. 30 menitan lebih gw tungguin sampe akhirnya bisa masuk kedalem bus. dan tetep aja, sempit2an haha. pas masuk emang gw rada maksain, abisnya entar bisa2 nunggu 15 menitan lagi, huaa. jadi pas gw masuk tas buku gambar gw ketarik badan orang2 gitu, ampe nyangkut di depan bapak2 dan depannya lagii haha.. jauh banget ya, tangan gw sampe gk sampe gitu ketarik gara2 megangin itu tas. trus gw ngomong pelan2 "waduh tas nya ketarik." syukur banget pada baik2 hehe, diambilin lah sama tuh bapak2 tas gw, walopun sempit dan sempet nyangkut2 hehehe.. makasi bapak.

terus si mas2 tukang penjaga pintu busway juga bae, dia nyuru gw ke pojokan deket pintu aja buat dapet tempat pegangan, soalnya pegangan di atas udah penuh, dan banyak yg udah copot, ada nya pegangan lurus di atasss bangeeet haha, gk nyampe itu mah gw. jadi karena udah terlnjur serong ke kiri, gw gak bisa balik badan lagi biar madep ke ara si mas2 tukang pintu, hehe, soalnya tas ranselnya rada nyangkut di badan si mas2 dan ibu2 di serong kanan gw. jadi biar gak ngerepotin ya, gw ngadep belakang aja hehe.

lalu, sampe lah ke halte sumber waras, jadi ada yang keluar beberapa. sebelum keluar, ada lagi bapak2 yang bilang "awas tuh jangan pinggir2 nanti kejepit," lagi-lagi orang bae yang berbeda. :) waah hebat ya. dengan terharu akhirnya gw agak geser ke kananan. dan setelah sedikit orang yang masuk, masuklah banyak orang, dan semakin sempit itu busway hehehe. dan baiknya, sangat lah baik, ibu2 yang udah lumayan tua, suru gw deketan ke dia, supaya gw gak kegencet gitu, si ibu malah sempet peluk gw, waa, senyumnya itu tulus pisan, dia baik deh, bahkan sempet kasi pegangan tangannya buat gw, supaya gw masi bisa pegangan setelah keseret masuk ke dalem gara2 banyak orang yang masuuuk dari halte sumber waras. wah ibu makasi banyakk!

Dan dari sumber waras menuju grogol, gw empet2an dan cuma bisa nunduk, hehe. mau gimana lagi, dan si ibu perhatian banget :) dipegangin gitu kalo gw udah ampir kemana2 ke bawa arus manusia hehe. dan pas gw keluar dari tuh bus, sempet bilang makasi san duluan sama itu ibu. :) walopun pas keluar aja sulitnya minta ampun, haha, pada buru2 yang keluar, dan ampe diluar rambut gw gak karuan minta ampuun hahaha.. :) tapi gapapa, senyum kok pas keluarnya itu hehe. :)

hebat hebat, senyuman dan kebaikan seseorang itu sangat bisa buat gw senyum lagi, walopun tadinya sempet kesel. :( makasi banyak ya Ibu, Bapak dan Mas2 hehehe. walopun empet2an masih bisa bersyukur hehe.
jadi keinget sama pembatas alkitab gitu deh gambarnya spongebob sama patrick, "if we cannot be clever, we can always be kind" hebat ya hebatt.

Lord, thanks God for today, :)

Open the heart and i hope i will..

2011-11-18T20:57:00.000-08:00

Thanks God i can smile and i can pray to You.

Let You lead my life, and i'm sure i will be the best.

Let me asking You and i know that You will give me all the things that i need, as Your plan.

Let me the light, give someone hope, and also have a hope.

Now i know what the meaning of Promise.

And i will make it just for You.

I know and i want try to always accept everything that happened in my life.

For my all family, for my study, for my heart, for my dreams, and for my happiness.

I hope someday i will give the best for my family, for the home, for a place and for a relation that i always call it "family".

I hope someday i will see they smile and i will be glad.

I hope i can listen everything from my heart, because i know You tell me the truth, and Your plan from a thing that i call it "heart".

And if i always walk with You, God, believe that i'm Yours and i will be Your light in this world, i hope i can always make You smile, a big smile.

I hope i can make You proud, because i just made from dust and soil, without Your kindness i still be nothing, no chance to breathe, no chance for praise You.

So, i really want life with You, know You more, and we are be the Father and child forever.

Make me always smile because i know You've given to me hundred reasons to smile.

Another about mine

2011-11-10T05:58:00.000-08:00

Where are you?
Where are we supposed to be?

I'm just need my self be strong,
I'm just want open my eyes, open my heart and believe it.

Let me walk the street alone,
enjoy that time, sing when i'm alone, pray when i'm in trouble,
crying when i'm praying, smiling when i feel i'm nothing, and hoping for the future.

Let me know something that i hope i can know it,
let me smile when i feel this world is never fair,
let me be my self, and let me to believe something that is hard to believe,
let me down, let me cry, and i will be strong enough,
let me convince about this life, the fact and the feeling,
let me show that this is me.

Let me tell everything that i want to explain,
let me listen everything that i properly to know, and i will keep it as a secret,
let me know what i feel and if i can asking my heart, i will ask,
let me know what i should to do and if my heart can tell me what, i will follow it,
let me follow my heart, as you always say,

let me smile and i hope it's never end,
let me fly away in the sky and get back with belief in my heart,
let me waiting in the rain, standing and praying,
let me sitting down on the street, seeing every precious thing in this life,
let me walking on night, but there's not fear anymore,

let me show that i'm here and i wish i always here,
let me walking together with time, so i don't afraid it leave me behind,
let me singing alone so i can feel better,
let me ask you to stay, so i can always walk with you,

let me know the meaning of all things that happened to me,
let me know the purpose of my life, so i can try to be in that way,
let me imagine that i'm a thing, and i will be smile forever,

let me tell you sorry for the mistakes that i made,
let me heal it, if i can, and i will pray for you in every pray that i shout,

let me be me, and i promise i will be the best of me,
let me be everything as Your plan, so i can be the best of Yours,
let me be with you although it's hard to accept it,
let me choose my choice, and i will be the owner of my heart and soul.

Sing Happy Birthday to youu

2011-11-10T05:08:00.000-08:00

Happy birthdayy my beloved sister.
Really i miss you so much, we are so far, but i know and i believe i am there with you.
20! it's not too young and it's not too short to know and feel that the kindness of God still be with you.
I'm really wish the best best best for you,
your life,
your future,
your choice of your life,
your study,
your everything!

I believe that God will listen my wishes, and He will give it to you, as His plan.
Just believe and listen to your heart, and you will be the better of you.
I know that it's hard to do, but i know you can.

Thank you Lord,
because You always walk with her,
love her,
bless her,
give her strength and happiness,
sadness to prove that she will be more stronger,
problems to make her wise,
tears to feel that sometimes you need to be hurt,
smile to show that you have the joy,
and because You always there, in her heart, she need You and please still with her in every second in her journey of her life.

Thank you Lord, for one more year You give her.
Because i love her, i miss her, and i want she be the best, for You and for her life.

Thank You for today, she can smile, she is happy and i believe she is beloved.
Lord, thank you, for Your plan, You made she, and You made me. And the best part is "i met her and she met me, as one in our family."

Your love is higher, higher than the heaven,
Your wise is deeper, deeper than the earth,
Your mercy wider, wider than the ocean,
i will never let You go, never ever let You go.

i love you,
Happy sweet-sweet 20th birthday, my sister!!
Wish you all the best, God Bless you always :)

Let You be the leader of my life

2011-11-09T06:15:00.000-08:00

God, really i feel like i'm nothing.
nothing.
i'm not someone that can give the best for people who loves me.
nothing.
i'm nothing so people, who i think they will care about me, prove me, they didn't care about me.
yes it's nothing.
hope but it's never come.

God, forgive me, i made all the things became wrong.
God, forgive me, i know i was so bad.
God, let me change my self, change my mind, so i will be a better person.
God, let me show You that i was so sorry to make You hurt.
God, please be with me every day, every minutes, every second, every breath that i breathe, every time i am alive.

Thank you God, for today, for a chance i can tell you anything else, and thank you for Your kindness to me and all people who i love and people who love me.
Thank you for one more chance to let me see this day, God.

Dear God.

2011-11-07T07:46:00.000-08:00

7 november:
gw cuma berharap yang terbaik buat lu dan buat gw.
nangis iya,
sedih iya,
kenangan ada bahkan banyak,
tapi keputusan udah gw ambil.

Tuhan, tolong sampein maaf aku ke dia.
Tuhan, tolong sampein kata terima kasih ku ke dia.
Tuhan, tolong kuatin dia.
Tuhan, tolong berikan yang terbaik buat dia.
Tuhan, tolong berikan senyuman buat dia.
Tuhan, tolong lindungin dia.
Tuhan, tolong Tuhan.

Ini toh namanya sakit hahaha

2011-10-28T22:54:00.000-07:00

Bandel, nah itu gw, "udah dibilangin kamu tuh tiap hari pulang kalo cape jangan paksain jalan kaki, naek apa gitu biar cepet sampe rumah," itu kata Mama.

"kamu makin hari makin kurus tuh pung, jangan diet-dietan deh, entar kalo umur 40 th tuh baru sana diet-diet. masih muda tuh perlu makanan, perlu gizi," itu kata Papa.

"udah sih pung, gw kalo jadi lu pengen makan ya makan aja, jangan ditahan-tahanin juga," itu kata temen gw, yang kalo mereka lagi pada makan gw cuma ngeliatin mereka makan, hahaha, nyiksa-nyiksa.

"gila lu pung, makan nasi cuma seiprit gitu, sok diet banget," itu kata cici gw yang kaget banget pertamanya liat sendokan nasi gw, hahaha, gw jawab, "diet yen. malem gak boleh makan nasi banyak-banyak."

"apung kurusan ya? udah bagus kurusan jadi lebih cakep," itu kata om gw, haha, akhirnya pujian, hehehe.

"pung, sakit ya? kok muka lu jadi tirus banget sih? jangan-jangan diet ya? udah cukup jangan kekurusan lagi," itu kata temen gereja gw.

"ini lu grid? bukannya lu yang ini? pas kapan? kok beda sih gak mirip begitu, difoto lu tembem banget," itu kata temen kampus pas gw kasih liat foto gw sama nci gw pas liburan sebelum masuk kuliah.

"inggrid ya? ih kok mukanya beda gw gak ngenalin. lu kurusan ya?" itu kata temen SMA gw, yang kita baru pernah ketemu dikampus belakangan ini.

"grid pesen makan gak? pasti gak makan deh," itu kata temen-temen kampus kalo lagi ngajakin makan bareng. udah ketauan pasti gw jarang makan. tapi tenang kok, gw bakal bertobat hahaha, abis sembuh gw mau makan yang buanyaaaakkk hahaha. tapi gak sampe gendut juga, cape ud diet-diet selama ini hehehe.

dan kata dokter pas liat hasil lab gw, "jarang makan daging ya? makan dong biar gak kurang gizi." hahaha, gw kayak makhluk kurang gizi emangnya ya? hehe. iya Pak ntar abis sembuh, daging saya embat hehe.

"inget ya jangan jalan-jalan, duduk aja terus duduk sama tiduran, banyak istirahat, nanti kalo kamu tetep bandel, mau pak dokter suntik? kaki kiri 7ml kaki kanan 7ml, biar kamu gak bisa jalan," itu kata dokter kedua gw, haha. jawaban gw iya dok, nurut-nurut, hahaha.

SAKIT?? huah rasa nya luar biasa. kata gw nano nano, campur aduk.
pusing. mabok. enek. mual.
kepala sakit, leher juga.
badan panas.
trombosit turun bikin syok.
bolak balik dokter.
berkali-kali suntik dan ambil darah, dari takut banget sampe lumayan takut.
itung-itung ud 5x ambil darah tapi tetep aja gw masi merem gak berani liat.
sampe ke akupuntur demi kepala sama leher yang berat yang gw kira karena masuk angin,
di tusuk lehernya, ditusuk pelipisnya, jempolnya, sama kakinya juga, dan nunggu selama 15 menit sambil tiduran huaa rada serem.
gak boleh mandi dulu.
gak boleh keramas dulu, ampe gw dikata-katain cici haha.
gak boleh cape-cape.
gak boleh berdiri-diri.
gak boleh makan nasi, tadinya, untung sekarang boleh, :)
bayangin cuma bubur polos tok, gak pake apa-apa, rasanya polos juga.
minumnya angkak direbus.
minum berbotol-botol.
doa berbalap-balapan, tapi gw percaya selalu sama kuasa doa :) amin
kangen sama kuliah.
takut ketinggalan pelajaran dan tugas numpuk gak kekejar.
kangen temen-temen kampus, kangen susu kacangnya, mereka juga katanya kangen gak nemenin gw beli susu kacang tiap hari, horee :)
kangen sama banyak orang.

dan sakit itu rasanya bersyukur,
mencoba untuk kuat disaat kelemahan datang,
mencoba untuk tersenyum disaat kekecewaan datang,
mencoba untuk sabar untuk menunggu sebuah jawaban,
mencoba untuk mencintai hidup lu, mencintai nafas lu, dan menyadari jadi orang sehat itu lebih dari sebuah anugrah.

makasi Tuhan, buat banyak hal yang udah boleh Kau izinin dalam hidupku.
makasi Tuhan, untuk orang-orang yang peduli dan sayang sama aku.
Thx God cause You never leave me alone :)

Antara cinta

2011-10-12T10:40:00.000-07:00

Pertahankanlah cinta itu
tapi jika sampai tersakiti, lepaskanlah
relakanlah dan terbangkanlah ke awan
karena birunya langit menghempaskan sakitnya

Jika cinta itu selalu ada
rasakanlah dan pahamilah maksud cinta
jangan tinggalkan dan berlalu tanpa memahami
tapi ajaklah cinta tinggal dalam benakmu

Cinta misteri, sulit ditebak, tapi tak bisa dilewatkan
cinta adalah anugrah, terlalu indah untuk dimiliki
tapi untuk itulah cinta ada
cinta adalah cinta, cinta untuk cinta

Jika cinta itu nyata, dan kau yakin
jalanilah dengan senyum cintamu itu
jangan lepaskan ia sebelum waktunya ia harus pergi
karena cinta bisakah untuk silih berganti?

Cinta datang sendirinya tanpa pernah kau undang
maka cinta tidak dapat kau larang, jika ia datang bukalah hatimu
jika cinta itu ternyata pergi menjauh, relakanlah
dan tunggulah sampai cinta yang lain mengetuknya

Cinta haruskah menyakiti? Bila sudah terlanjur
cinta haruskah berani? Bila ketakutan sudah tertanam
cinta haruskah dilepaskan? Bila cinta itu sudah lenyap
Cinta yang lain bolehkah menyapa? Bila cinta adalah cinta

Cinta maafkanlah, jika cinta itu sementara
cinta maafkanlah, jika tangis akan muncul
cinta maafkanlah, jika cinta itu akan mundur
cinta relakanlah, jika cinta itu akan pergi

Cinta adalah tangisanku saatku tak tau harus kemana
cinta adalah senyumanku saatku tau ku tak sendirian
cinta adalah memoriku saatku putar ulang kembali kenangan itu
cinta adalah anugrah saatku percaya cinta

Cinta haruskah begini? Kesulitan dan tak tahu jalannya
cinta bolehkah aku pergi sejenak? Merenungi apa arti cinta
cinta bolehkah aku menyakitimu? Karena cinta bukanlah dusta
cinta bolehkah memaafkanku? Jika aku sudah percaya cinta

Cinta apakah akarmu goyah? Apa aku mampu meluruskannya?
cinta apakah mimpimu akan nyata? Bila ditengahnya aku menghancurkannya
cinta apakah rela untuk biarkan cinta itu lenyap?
cinta apakah datang lagi untuk membawamu terbang?

Cinta memohon, cinta berharap, cinta menunggu
cinta itu datang, cinta berjalan, cinta berlari
cinta itu terjatuh, cinta terbangun, cinta terluka
cinta itu dibalut, cinta dikuatkan, cinta menjadi dewasa

Cinta bila mengecewakanmu, maafkanlah
cinta bila cinta itu berlari melewatimu, biarkanlah
hanya maaf yang cinta hadirkan
hanya maaf yang cinta tawarkan

Cinta bukan sembarang cinta
cinta kuat, cinta sanggup menghilangkan beban
cinta bahkan sanggup menghilangkan penghalang
cinta itu berkorban, cinta itu mampu melawan

Cinta berkata ya jika ya, dan tidak jika tidak
jika cinta bukan seperti itu, bukanlah itu cinta
cinta bukan berdusta, jika ya, ampunilah cinta itu
karena cintamu masihlah di dunia

Cinta, biarkanlah ia punya sayap untuk terbang
cinta, lepaskanlah bebannya dan biarkan ia tersenyum
cinta, tariklah pengikatnya dan maka ia akan berlari
cinta, bila ia terjatuh, biarkanlah maka ia akan dewasa

Cinta, perjalananmu sudah panjang
cinta, berganti silih berganti untuk menemukan cinta
cinta, hentikanlah di suatu tempat hingga selamanya ia disana
cinta, biarkanlah hanya untuknya dan tak terlepas lagi

Cinta, tak pahamkah arti cinta itu?
cinta, pejamkan matamu, dan bangunlah esok
cinta, menangislah sampai cinta itu menghapusnya
cinta, tertawalah sampai cinta itu membuat tawa

Cinta, bilamana cinta itu berhenti, apakah rela?
cinta, bilamana cinta itu berhenti dan tak berjalan lagi, apakah salah?
cinta, bilamana cinta itu pergi, apakah cinta mengejarnya?
cinta, bilamana ia bersalah, apakah cinta penuh maaf?

Cinta memohon Tuhan untuk selalu bersama cinta
cinta berharap yang Tuhan beri adalah yang terbaik
cinta berbahagia bila Tuhan memberi cinta untuk selamanya
cinta tersenyum dalam hatinya bila Tuhan telah mengajari cinta

Cinta, adalah kata cinta
cinta, terlalu indah tapi juga menyakitkan
cinta, penuh tawa tapi juga tangis
cinta, adalah kata hati

Bila cinta itu goyah dan entah jatuh kemana, tunggulah cinta itu
bila cinta harus memilih, kuatkanlah cinta itu
sampai cinta menemukan cinta
sampai cinta dewasa dan percaya cinta

words called prayer

2011-10-10T08:49:00.000-07:00

God, there are many ways in this life, too many choices that You’ve given to me. But, choices really make me confuse and I don’t know how I can choose one from them.

God, I know that You are so good and You give me more than I need,
You give me smile when I’m crying,
You give me a place when I was lost,
You give me time when I think I was late,
You give me peace when I think I was lonely,
You give me life when I think I’m nothing and world without me is still the same.

God, I hope there still long time for me to change, for me waiting and believe. I don’t know how can I through the life without You, because from You the breath was given, and still You give it to me.

God, please, never go away from me because I’m really nothing without You.

feel like in a boat

2011-10-07T08:11:00.000-07:00

We are too far
We are not allow to be together
We are too different
We are not same
We have a different life
a different believes
a different world
but we have a same Lord
and that's will make us one

He said life is amazing
He said life is a full part of sadness and happiness
He said life is your choice
but he also said sometimes loneliness is more than anything
He said a smile can change problems
He said a brave heart is the winner
He said love is always in heart
but he also said sometimes nothing can changes you

Lonelyyy

2011-09-08T03:36:00.000-07:00

Setiap hari aku bercapai-capai ria naek busway dari kampus ke rumah. Abis dari harmoni transit deh ke sawah besar naek m12. hehe nah pas di jalan di m12, aku duduk disebelah ibu-ibu, lagi gendong anak balita, eh balita itu nengok2 ke arah aku. aku bingung dipelototin anak balita. Salting iya hehe.. :) balitanya lucu, dia mencoba menggapai-gapai entah bajuku, atau tas ranselku. Aku cuma cengo, hehe, awal2nya pura2 gak nyadar, tapi makin lama dia makin mendekat :p hehe. Tapi lama2 aku senyum juga, sambil ikut noel tangan kecilnya :) jd inget deh lucu kali ya kalo waktu bisa diulang kembali, dan pengen banget jd anak kecil lagi!!
Tadi aku juga ngeliat ibu-ibu jualan kacang di deket pasar baru sana, tiap hari, ngelap plastik kacangnya yang bertebaran debu di pinggir jalan itu. Ya, tapi semuanya ttep berusaha buat hidup! buat kerja, buat nyari nafkah. Dan aku harus berjuang!
ketika ngeliat tukang ngamen di pinggir jalan, aku juga jadi iri, pengen belajar gitar, pengen jago dan bisa menyanyi memuji Tuhan :) semoga aku bisa!

Di kelas menggambar, aku ngeliat banyak bangeeet orang-orang berbakat. luar biasa! jagoo. aku gk ada apa-apanya, bahkan dibabat abis deh. Tuhan, bantu aku Tuhan, kata orang musti maksimal, kalo gak kamu gak akan dianggep kalo cuma jadi pas-pasan aja. Ya Tuhan, aku harus mampu.
Belum lagi soal temennya, aku belom nemuin yang cocok. Temen ce semua dan bingunglah tiap kali aku harus numpang-numpang kesana kemarii.. Aku capee ya ampun. Apa harus selalu begini? di gereja? di sekolah? di kampus? cukup cukuup!
Tapi semua aku serahin lagi ke Tuhan, kepadaMulah semuanya bermula dan berakhir. saat dosen sejarah ngomong "smua dari kalian akan mati juga." yaa bener banget, apa yang udh aku lakukan yang buat efek ke masa nanti? bukan cuma di dunia, tapi juga untuk hidup yang kekal nanti. :) wish me luck and be loved always, all because of your love, God.

coming again!

2011-08-01T07:22:00.000-07:00

thx Lord.. it's already a half year of 2011 :) so fast but still i know it's really a bless from You!
and I will be a university student, at Untar, yes, i've chosen design for my next lesson :) and i promise i will study hard!
and i really surrender to You because i know that all the things You've planned for me is the one and the best. I will not be jealous with another person, actually i will try to not to be jealous, and if i still want to be a chef, i will practice cooking at home :)on the contrary, I will be envy to learn about something from another person, and i hope i can do that :)

thx really for my holiday, my best friends, my family, my sisters, and for Your best love :) i hope i can be better and better :D

TIME too FAST! I must decide one!

2010-09-30T08:43:00.000-07:00

Thanks for the Wednesday that i must change my mind to change my life too.
don't be so sensitive, and now i try to get some power to love my self.

yes.. GOD. You have made me so I know there is a something special that I have, and nobody has it. so smile and be thankful of all.
God have plans and every plans that He made is always BEST, not only good.
SO learn me to find that, every place that YOU placed is the right place to do something to change the world.
change the world? YES. but the first thing is CHANGE MY SELF.

I have been seeing people around me. and ask GOD why I can't be like them?
Why I don't have the chance like they have?
Why and why?
maybe I'm jelous for anything that I don't have.
But, please sure me that I'm a THING, same like you.

I don't want be jelous, but I want to be envy.
I want to learn to be brave.
Smile to new or my old friend.
Give a greeting to them, even that I know they never give their smile to me
Smile in the weakness and be brave to speak in front of the class.
Care and be a patient.
I don't want to A or B, but I want to be THE BEST OF ME.
the maximum of Inggrid. I hope.

so I want learn anything about something new. Never want to be a notulist, but be a speaker.
Learn to manage time and do the quality time.
I want to get a cooking lesson if I can't take a management of hospitality for my next study.
I want to have Chinese lesson so that I can speak Chinese.

what I'm now maybe not my best.
but i try to be best.
LORD YOU HAD MADE ME SO NOW I WANT TO MAKE YOU SMILE BY MY LIFE.

Decide one of something that I don't want so is a difficult.
Management hospitality?
Design?
Phsiocology?
i don't know. maybe just time KNOW and LORD know.
so let me know.

so that I can make them pride of me some day.
someday. i'm promise..
i will be someone. not only a thing.

i don't want to make them disappointed.
i want they smile some day when they see me I'm s S1.
really happy, GOD.
I BELIEVE YOU CAN. I CAN. AND THEY CAN.

thanks GOD. for everything.
for YOUR BLESS. and ALSO YOUR LOVE.
thanks GOD. I Love You. :)

try to brighten for a smile-

2010-07-05T05:54:00.000-07:00

i miss her so much.
and i really want to meet her.
i miss all of them,
seeing in the photos. and i know she are here in my heart.

I'm sorry Lord for the things I'd made it.
when it's all about You, Jesus.

for the new class, new year for study at twelve. i hope it is the right time for create my future. see my future. and hopefully for my future too

I'm coming with all the sins, the hard and the worst thing.
I'm not anyone and I'm really not anything without You.

see the brighten, for all the commitments. for all smile.
for doing all the talent that You had given to me.
everyone has miracle, and I've too.
for growing up, be positive, and be sure.
I'm still in metamorphosis. and these are my efforts.

waiting for the new body, for being a butterfly.
hope for the newer for me, so I can fly around the world and seeing how great all the nature that You've created.
I'm a girl with a big misunderstanding and I'm the way of being curious.
this is me. really me.

i have a best song:
Lord You are loyal
never leave me alone
and I trust on You
You are mine
and I am Yours

My desire is make higher Your name
b'cause I know
You are in me
and I'm in You

Change my life oh Lord
as white as Your heart
as right as Your cross
Your love ooh Lord ooh

Let my eyes as yours
brighten Your love oh Lord
I want to be, like You oh Lord

that's all :)

NOT PERFECT-

2010-05-31T21:22:00.000-07:00

no one perfect and i'm really not!

i can't know what you might think about me.
i can't get all things what i expected.
i can't tell you what my heart feels.
i can't accept all your words that make me down.

but i can try accept you to gone away and said to me, i'm the worst friend, maybe.

you know what i was feeling that time, but then no reason you just said it to me.
no thinking about my feeling and maybe you think i don't have a heart, oh no, maybe you think i don't have "a piece" of heart.

just one word: GOOD! Just keep it for your fun.

then i ask why, and you said the worst reson too.
so really i'm so not in the mood. good job, friend.

see then, who i'm for you? just a big doll?
as you wish, right.
or maybe i'm just a tool?
good. then when i was "broken", you threw me far away.

actually, really i want to throw the bad word away, and think it's all rihgt.
but it's really hard and you never know how really i want it.

so now, what can i do? just sit thinking of you and wondering why did you say it to me?
it's just a simple word but i know the meaning is deeper.

ok, just forget it, because today my first holiday and i don't want you just come and walk and talk in my head, again and again.
it's all rihgt.
i'm appologize if i have hurt you.
And let see, still we be friend?

2010-05-27T08:08:00.001-07:00

Have you ever felt that you are so annoying?
Or have you ever met someone so annoying?

No use?
No talent?
Be wrong and never be right?
If YES, you're same with me..

"No use to tell and so It saves it.
No use to change so It's still.
No use to remind because it wants peace.
No use to talk because it needs silence.
No use to smile because it's dishonest.
No use to cry because it's vain.
No use to be happy because it's not.
No use to try knowing because they said it's private.
No use to refuse it, because they never comes.
No use to look for the best way on it because nobody wants.
No use to get across them because they said it's too late.
No use to be still care because the tiring.
No use to be free because it doesn't happened.
No use to try to make all ok because the lonliness.
No use to get up early because nobody care of it.
No use to think life is good if it wasn't.
No use to say it but it's no act.
No use to be like it, if you weren't.
No use to know all about the theory but it's so far.
No use to have change to get back because every disappoinment had come.
No use to imagine the past because time is never be back.
No use to remember them because it has gone."

it's only a piece of someone journey and they never give up to make the opposite of them all.

Bless you :)

I'm getting older, and hope I'm getting better.. :D

2010-04-07T03:43:00.000-07:00

Today, 7 April is really my lovely day,
my lovely birthday,
my 17th birthday.. :D

first of all,
of course i thx to God for His blessing,
for His love so He gives me a long breath,
a long day to seeing the world,
a long heart to try keep smiling,
happiness,
joyful,
but actually my life is also full with tears,
but there is always a big proud to say, "Now i'm 17 years old!",
many things that i've seen, i've feel,
=missing my sisters,
=seeing how beautiful the wolrd is,
=have fun and great things with my best friends,
=knowing and also passing the amazing life that God has given to me!

:D i'm say that I'm happy,
must being happy for the new age, for a new spirit, for a new year,

17 is a big number, maybe tomorrow will be my 17years old ++,
but i will never forget this dayy..
For every things that my friends, family, and Lord given to me,
Smile and laugh,
tears and sadness,
happiness and wisdom,
life and wealth,
health and breath,
love and peace,
mother and father,
dede and ayen,
friends and best friends:
-Aurellia (muaaahh :p)
-Velicia (miss u so :D)
-Marcella (si gatel yg baik hatii)
-Siska (chuuu)
-Nadia adeekuu
-Oci :p
-Ijoo
-Nene (:D)
-Yeye ( :D)
-Bayii muaach
-Sherwin si genduut
-Babas
-Willy
-Anto
-Danil
-Meta
-Ting2
-Kus2 yang lagi diett, hehe ;p
-All my friends, i love youu
-And also Idwal :p hehe
my life and my future.

Now i'm 17 years old,
but i know and realize that i'm not getting older (maybe a little-little),
but i'm getting better and better, i'm sure :D

I hope a good day like this day will never end,
i hope a new handphone really! >.< but, i will be patient to wait for it.. 6760, i want youu soo.. :p haha
I hope a new spirit to get thinner, :D
I hope smiles always here in my lips,
I hope the good for me, but God know the best!

thx God for this day,
this lovely day,
this life, my life,
my family, my friends,
and all my day.
Here i'm coming to be 17years old. :D
Here I'm coming to have smiles and praises in my life :D
hope soo ;D

I want to be free, enjoying everything, and smiling..

2010-03-26T22:25:00.000-07:00

Kali ini gw mau pake bahasa indo aja. Biar lebih mencintai negara sendiri. :P
Lebih menghargai Indonesia, hehee.

Udah lama gak nulis blog, tadi pas pulang dari PA, gw kangen banget nulis blog.
Gak tau kenapa, pas lewatin jembatan menuju rumah gw.
Ceritanya gw lihat tuh awan2 dari jembatan, keren banget, dan gw tiba2 bersyukur buat segala sesuatu yang gw udah punya.
Walopun kadang gw gak pernah menghargainya.

Gw tahu, semua orang bilang "hidup ini anugrah dan musti disyukuri"

Tapi kadang buat mensyukuri itu semua, rasanya sulit ya?
Lihat orang lebih oke dan lebih bahagia kok rasanya gw iri ya?
Padahal, gw jauhhh lebih baik beribu-ribu kali lipat daripada orang laen, yang tinggal di pinggir jalan, yang boro2 kenal komputer, boro2 tau internet.
Tapi gw masih suka mencaci maki smart gw. Yang lemot setengah ampun, haha :D
so what ya? bagus masih bisa nulis blog. masih bagus punya game di komputer.

Dan gw bosen tinggal di Jakarta, gw bosen buat ngelihat hal-hal yang selalu gw lihat.
Loh?
Tapi bukan berarti gw pengen gak bisa lihat (haha, manusia memang banyak mau nya).
Gw pengen lihat sawah,
lihat pemandangan yang alami banget,
pengen maen layang-layang,
pengen duduk nongkrong di batu-batu sambil nyanyi2,
pengen gambar-gambar,
pengen mancing ikan,
pengen dapet ketenangan,
pengen senyum,
pengen lihat semua hal-hal dari kaca mata positif supaya gw bisa jadi orang yang lebih baik,
pengen ketemu banyak hal,
pengen lebih dewasa,
pengen dihargai,
pengen dipercaya,
pengen ketawa lepas kayak dulu lagi,
pengen bahagiaaa, bener2 pengen bahagia,
pengen bisa mengubah pandangan orang laen,
pengen puas dengan apa yang ada,
pengen lebih deket sama temen2 gw,
pengen impian dan cita2 gw tercapai, (walopun gak tau mau jadi apa nanti)

Begitulah manusia..
dan begitulah gw..
Gw cape buat segala hal yang gw alami,
pengen pergiii jauh, dan minta waktu bentar buat hilang, dan kemudian balik lagi.
haha, tapi seenaknya banget gw, emang sopo gw,
sampe gw bisa minta hal2 aneh kayak gitu..

I just want to smile
and have a new life in this year
maybe with tears and with a smile
but, God, please hold me,
with all my heart to go straight,
strength in the weakness,
smile in the sadness,
pray in the troubles,

A smile make me more better.
Kita harus tersenyum di saat yang paling sakit.
GBU

hheyy, christmas is neariinggg

2009-12-18T21:20:00.000-08:00

heyyy, friendss..

i like christmas so muchh..
the best moment that i've had..

C . H . R . I . S . T . M . A . S

"since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another"
1john 4:11

to my dearest friends (Velicia and Francesca),

may God bless you,

more, more, and more,

until you feel the really Christmas meaning in your life,

may you all and me become little candle,
can bring happiness,

can bring joyful,
can bring love,

can bring hope,
and bring smile in every people's heart whom we've met.

GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

let's we try to care to another person,
let's we become new,
let's we become lighter,

like a candle have done before, lighter us,

and make us see how beautiful the life is.

when everyone is far awayy, i'm still waitingg for

2009-12-18T20:45:00.000-08:00

i'm just at home, lonely,

waiting for something special on this holiday,

hoping a new spirit on my simple life,

missing every friends in another place,

i miss Tat-tat,

i miss Aurel,

i miss Payet,

i miss Ijo,

i miss Siska,

i miss Nong-nong,

i miss Mar-mar,

i miss Ye-ye,

i miss Novi,

i miss Oci,

i don't miss your face,
because i don't forget your face actually,
i just really-really miss the time when I'm together with you..

just playing with you,
just talking with you,
just crying with you,
just laughing with you,

can i playing, talking, crying, laughing without you?
i think yess, if i'm a little bit crazy..

heyy, where are you, guys?
i'm just waiting for some friends in my mind to send me a little message on my handphone,
i'm just waiting for you, on my facebook,
i miss youu so,
i'm just waiting for your laugh, for our togetherness,

what's wrong with my heart, recently?
i'm just feel nothing, and tasteless of course,
with smile, i just can say: "i don't know why"

to one person of my friends:
maybe i'm not "a friend" that you want, but please,
the times goes on, and our friendship is going far away too,
don't you realize it?

you still call me best friends, but where?
where is the meaning of "friendship" for you?
i just want to say that : "i really miss youu, my friend"

nothing special when i woke up this morning,
but i know, i can wake up today is really special for me,
it's a sign that i still alive..

i'm doing anything like yesterday-yesterday- and still like yesterday,
i always hold my handphone, my crazy handphone, and now, i'm tiring to hold it..
what's wrong with me???

heyyy, you, guys,
thank you for all your kindness to me,
i'm nothing without you,
i'm not the best,
i'm not perfect,
yess, i'm who i am..

all of my friends, i love youu soo..
:D

heyy, there are smiless todayy :D

2009-12-11T09:12:00.001-08:00

i'm just so really-really happy todayyy..

because of one, two, three, four, five, six, or seven reasons??
I don't know, i can't remember how mucchhh happiness that i have got todayy..

i went to Gading with:
Jamurerss
Awurel, Nong-nong, Ye-ye, Mar-mar, ocii
Kepin, idwal, danil, willy, kus-kus

i went to MOI with:
Nong-nong and Aurel,
and of course with tukang bajaj, haha,
ceban-ceban, hen kueii lahh yaaa..??
XD we didn't get facilities like we expected, haha..

-a little smile come when i must bring a gift to him-
-a little smile then grows up, and then become a really-really big smile-
-a big smile then grows up, become a little laugh-

-shock, depresion, miss understanding with them, debate, all of them just like threw away from my heart, just todayy maybeee-
-a shocked from Nero and him-

oooh, Nero, how cool are you if you didn't bark at me like this afternoon.
i just can stand up, with a crazy face, really like a crazy facee, really-really.
i just thought where is my handphone, so i can call Marcella to save me from Nero..

who is Nero?

A dog (amalgamasi=perkawinan campuran from kampung and labrador), he so bigg (to me), so scary (for me, nong-nong, and aurel)

nero, really, you make me dag dig dug, at marcella's house, of coursee, my dagdigdug is just only for youu,
i had a unable to explained facee, really surprised and also afraid, 100% is afraidd so mucch..

but, at gading, my dagdigdug is a little bit different, :p
different moment,
different people,
differen placee,
of coursee.. XD

really, it's hard to explain,
just me, my friends and God who know thatt happiness,

God, just really-really thx for:
11st december 2009
it's not just a datee, but a day that i can't be forgeet, always in my memorial, :D

thx to my beloved friends,
and to nong-nong:
life must go on, maybe God have different way to make you 'mandiri (what is mandiri in english?),

soo? Keep prayingg and let God lead you..
don't think you do first and then God do the rest?
Do you think God is just like 'pengikut',

but, actually,
God is the leader, right? :D

thx to:
a christmas carol, one word:
T 0 P (alias mantaapp, wkwkaa),
sorry for Aurel, whose hands i have hit so many timess, during the film goes on..

Thx to:
mr Jalean,
i wasn't feel bored when i was in your taxii,
your experiment so greatt :p

to God, really,
this is happiness alonggg dayy,
just don't want to sleep,
cause i'm so happy to remember all these,

from this morning doing sport exam,
until this night go out from taxi with smilee~~

my little edited note XD

2009-11-26T10:19:00.000-08:00

This note belongs to:
people who LOVE and still LOVING-

Sometime i try to forget you,
but,
everytime i'm thinking of you,

sometime i try to feel like you feel (tasteless),
but,
everytime i feel more and more colourful because of you,

sometime i try to throw away that "LOVE" is,
but,
everytime "L0VE" is coming and still coming without give me a gap,

sometime i pray to God, for my better live without you,
but,
how often i pray, i realize more and more that i can't live without you,

sometime i feel like a fool in a certain time, but,
everytime i really-really like a fool when i'm together with you,

sometime i'm a nervous,
but,
everytime i lose all my words to say, when we are talking together,

sometime i think i just want to remember you once,
but,
everytime i still thinking of you,

everytime i think i'm sure you will not be mine,
but,
sometime some parts in my heart want you will be mine,

somewhere i think i'm brave to show what i feel about you,
but,
everywhere i meet you, i lose my bravery rapidly,

sometime i'm depressed,
but,
a very-very little care from you will erase all my depressions,

sometime i feel boring and tiring to pass my day,
but,
by seeing your face,
by seeing your smile,
by seeing your laugh,
will make me defend to through it,

sometime i feel i'm nothing,
but,
everytime you smile at me, i feel like i'm so precious,

sometime i'm easy to enjoy something new,
but,
everytime i'm staying beside you, i get stuck and silent in many language (=diam seribu bahasa mksudnyaa),

sometime i try to see every people's eyes when i have a conversation with,
but,
everytime he starts talking to me, i'm really like having a big problem (just to see his eyes),

sometime i feel i'm alone,
but,
i feel i'm so-so happy everytime you come, althrough you just smile at me,

sometime i feel desperate,
but,
it's like a new spirit of happiness, everytime you give me a very little-little-little chance to know you more,

sometime i don't like waiting,
but,
a message from you will make me want to wait so long-long time,

sometime i'm calm,
but,
everytime he looking at me, i'm getting crazy, crazier and craziest (i feel my heart sent a dag-dig-dug sound),

everytime i'm so stupid at certain lesson,
but,
sometime i want to show him that i'm clever at (actually i'm trying to be clever at that lesson)
,

everytime i'm waiting for his message, by seeing my handphone more and more,
but also,
everytime i'm waiting, i feel hopeless so much,

everytime i'm waiting for his greeting,
but also,
everytime i'm waiting, it's make me down,

everytime i'm waiting for that lesson,
but also,
everytime i'm waiting, it's seem usual, just sit and do our duty without talking each other,

everytime i feel i must write about something i want to share, like this note,
and everytime i must do really-really hard to keep my note doesn't lose, cause i often klick the wrong "tombol", and then my long note disappear, "syuuungggg",
and never come back until i'm writting agaiinnn.. >.<

love isn't...

2009-11-26T10:15:00.000-08:00

"Love isn't always as you see it
love isn't always as you dream it should be
love isn't always gonna find you
but this is love cause you're all I'm thinking of."

To my dearest sister,
i know that your love isn't always be happy, no one can through it with laugh only, but with the tears.
love needs patience, waiting for the time, to grow up together with you.
love needs heart, and also heart needs love, and i know you are right.
love needs take care of each other, sharing to your family, happy, sad, praying, and singing together.
love needs a distance, and if it's so long and far, love is never give up to reach.
love needs you, and me.
love needs togetherness, talking at night, walking over the night.
love needs your hope, your dreams, your futures, and your imagination.

and also..
every second needs love,
every morning proves love,
every breath proves love,
every moment needs love,
every life needs love,
and every time you sure that is love, go through it and never give up to prove your love,
although the difference of you,
although the time limit you,
although the distance want to let your love go,
try to belive and you'll be see that your true love is now and hope it for forever.

i really miss you, and i love you so :)

How really interested, my dear friend, Awurellia??

2009-11-26T02:21:00.001-08:00

This note in my blog is really-really dedication to Awurellia, n for you all, of course, my dearest-dearest friendssss..

My title is so amusing, right? :DD

i totally say yeesss! XD

because i got it from her, awurelia, at geography lessons 2 days ago.. Before, my teacher had came and i couldn't finish it..

Awurelia??

Who is she?
She is 16years old,

we started our friendship at first grade of junior high school without "klop", why i say without "klop"? (it's not a offensive declaration, friend)

Because, it's really hard to build a friendship, it's like a way to pass big mountain, big sea, wide forest, (waw, it's seem really-really hard to get a friendship),

oke, it's not mean "lebay", but it's really happen to us, every we start and do our friendship, right?

Friendship will not come and then join with us rapidly, when we was saying each other, "oo, of course, you are my dear friend"

in my opinion,
friendship is a relation,
between two or more people,
that care, love, and keep each other..

If we say about care, love, and keep, they are something which show us,
WE WILL N0T SAY FRIENDSHIP EASY TO REACH, but, i don't say WE CAN'T BE BEST FRIEND IN A SHORT TIME..

Like i have done to Awurellia, maybe you have done too, to your belonging friend:
you made your friend was sad,
you made your friend was angry,
you made your friend felt lonely,

yeess, how long have we been passing, to make our friendship become better and better, like a knitted (=rajutan, bukan rel? XD)..

As time goes away, then our knitted will be good, or maybe we hope it will be excellent..

Two tumbs up for you, Awurellia:
a great person,
a patient person,
full of strength,
full of warm,
full of colourful,
full of care,
full of understanding,
and how amusing you are,

you bring me "SMILE" and then tell me "A FRIENDSHIP WILL N0T BE COUNTED, HOW MUCH M0NEY YOU CAN GIVE TO HAVE A FRIENDSHIP"

you show me become a honestly person,
be my self,
and of course be opened..

you always try to be your self,
you try hard to get want you're dream about,
you try to bring happiness and then you spread that happiness to the other and to me of course,

three tumbs up,
for your patient and your power (in chinese, we say it jia you), i mean you still jia you,

and still waiting for HIM,

amazing,
brilliant (haha, now i'm like a commentator at a television show)..
How often we get problem or indonesian people say it "slek", we are growing together and having a greater-greater heart..

And the most is,
"the meaning of friendship", yees, you guys all have taught me..
Then i can be a better person, day by daay..

I'm so lucky, guys, get a part(=ikt ambil bagian) in your part of your life,
or maybe in your part of your heart,
or maybe in your part of your long-long memories,

0R:
without you there isn't me,
i mean, i can not be like i am now, without youu..

-L-0-V-E-Y-O-U-

created by: k.o.e.k.i

Need a new spirit.. :DD

2009-11-24T16:34:00.000-08:00

Heii.. >.<
tired2..
Huh..

I need a long holidaay,
i need something new,

i need something unusual,
i need a great moment to colour my day,

i need refreshing to make my day fresh,
i need power from God,

i need love from God and you, (again, i say about love again)
i need something new,

i need conversation with you,
i need a bravery, to say what i want to say,

i need a capability to gone from my place, for a while,
i need a long time to sleep,

i need a new-new-new brain to return a little of my memory,
i need smile, smile, smile, a way to smile~~ in a tiring daay..

i need Y0U.. :DD

D R E A M form a girl :D

2009-11-23T07:06:00.001-08:00

Westlife says:
"i have a dream, a song to sing~~"

and then now i'm saying:
"i have a dream, a plan for real"

i'm on the way to 17th, next april i'm 17, and now i'm still be a girl yet..

D.r.e.a.m??

Just a word, with:
D, R, E, A, M
but: hard to get your dream,

Actually,
You dream about something, something good, something real, something bring happiness, something bring you up,
but now,

what is your dream?
Or what are your dreams?

Why-why-why,
i'm so stress if i'm thinking about "my future",
not only think:
-what i will to be, but i must think about:
-what my mother and father want me to be,

i just know i want the best,
but everybody know that, and everybody try to accomplish that..

So, the race has begun, and now it's my time to start running.. (and for you, too, of course)

Because, the world is getting crazy, people are getting to be "most" and "most",
and i still really-really realize that there isn't a "LATE word"

DREAM is a must,
but the REAL dream is given to you by God,
what will you be next?
It's depend of me, of you, and of us..

YOU ARE N0T ALONE..

GOD IS STILL WITH YOU..

EVERY PROBLEMS COME BUT YOU GOD, HAVE DONE IT BEST..

So?

What must we afraid about?
:DD
Let us start running together, to get a better life..

"like M.J said: make a better place for you and for me"

let's do something to change the world,
with a new spirit,
a new day tomorrow,
with a smile,
and the newest of purpose,
with loving your creature,
with loving your place,
with loving your dream,
and of course with loving your self.. :DD

g.b.u

Everyone feel this.. :0

2009-10-30T21:59:00.001-07:00

Nobody teaches us to be loved,
but everybody teach us to love,

nobody can tell us how often we must be loved,
but everybody can tell us to always love, more and more,

nobody gives us advice what the ways, so everybody will love us,
but everybody give us advice the ways to love,

nobody shows us, what will we must be, so everybody will love us,
but everybody show us to love without exception (=syarat),

but, the facts are:
everybody want to be loved but they never want to start loving another people..

Yes.. it's will be really sick,
by loving people, but those people don't care about us,

but, i think it's so usual,
i think:
"LOVE" is care to somebody, when maybe that person never care to you,

"LOVE" is not always make you smile, but, of course "LOVE" is bring you strength,

"LOVE" often make you down or stress or jealous, but, "LOVE" is a trust that you believe that "LOVE" is not must be mine, maybe someday, "LOVE" leave you alone,

but sometime "LOVE" are the strength, the power to pass your day, the power to be smile, and the power to get happiness,

but, i really feel that "LOVE" often make you really really down, but, not for a long time.. Then you can get up, have a new power, and of course still keep the "LOVE" inside,

"LOVE" is a grace, the biggest grace that God had already given us, and until now, his "LOVE" is still alive for us,

"LOVE" is like as a water in the river, that will be flow and it's just stop when we stuck the flow..
So, never stop our heart to be LOVING and be LOVED..

and i know that "LOVE" is between me, but isn't between "you"..

but i really believe, i still have "LOVES", those are between me and you, and YOU GOD..

God bless you.. :)
finish-

Busaat dah.. T.T

2009-10-27T09:11:00.000-07:00

Siapa yang menyebabkan facebook ku invalid eror pasword or email?
Haaduuuh.. >.< parah, menjahili org yg gak ngerti teknologi.. Untung blog gw gak di sabotase juga.. T.T

haha, kaget juga, tiba2 gak bs bka facebook, hehe, tp it's oke.. Bisa bertahan tnpa facebook.. Pasti bisaa..! Harus, sampe bener lagi.. Tp entah kapan?? T.T

:( :| :) :D

2009-10-13T21:17:00.000-07:00

Actually i get one follower again.. :) hihi..

Part one:
i miss my sister so much, haha, she got a strange ill, we call it: "cold blood=darah dingin".. Then china got typhoon, and yesterday she got flood, of course..

Part two:
the best article is:
i think i am on the way (otw) of getting my happiness again.. Haha, long time to see again.. Welcome back.. Forget problems, enjoy my simple life..

Part three:
i'm so stressed about my future..
Last Sunday, at church i see Michael, 7 years old, and he is close blind (i mean= his eyes are closed).. But, he is so great when he is playing piano.. So interested for me.. And then, he makes me thinking, what will i be next?

Part four:
blind boy (sesca said this, when i asked her what "org buta" in english..
I mean a blind boy can get his way for his future..
And i can't press sol (=5) at piano greatfully.. Why??
No practise of course,
no talent maybe.. :)

part? What part? I don't know..
Last part i think:
let me forget him.. Unuseful feeling, because there will be my best later, not him now.. :) i hope so..

:) the end.

2009-09-30T22:29:00.000-07:00

I need holiday again..!

....

2009-09-30T22:27:00.000-07:00

I need my smile back
i wish i'm happy
i hope i'm not alone
i know i'm lucky, but it's not now

i want get it, but i can't.

COME ON! Just smile, inggrid :)

2009-09-07T03:03:00.001-07:00

Tired.. Tired and tireed.. I want big holidays! I want to go somewhere, forget my problems, now!

Tiring to study so much, need some funny recreation, need some happiness, and also hope to live happily all along my life.

S-M-I-L-E
why are 5 words can't i do? Specially, when i am at school?

I got a new seat in my class, yes, i'm happy with sesca, but why we are must in front of the whiteboard?
Goood.. -.-

must smile! And i also need a smile.. :D :D
yes, i hope i can.. :)

artikeel lombaaa

2009-08-27T07:44:00.003-07:00

Jadi, ceritanya bulan Februari ato Maret yang lalu, pas lagi pelajaran BI, ada ade kelas yang dateng terus nawarin lomba ke Ibu Guru BI, lomba apa ya namanya, hehe, kalo gak salah lomba menulis artikel, sama ada juga lomba debat pake bahasa Inggris.

Pertama Beliau nawarin satu kelas, siapa yang mau ikut. Tapi emang dasar pada males, gk ada yang mau ikutan. Terus mentang-mentang aku duduk tuh di depan meja guru, jadi di depan si Ibu Guru duduk, nah si Ibu tiba-tiba manggil "Inggrid, kamu ikutan aja tuh coba-coba. Menang gk menang gak papa, yang penting kan udah nyoba." Kaget. Haha, apa-apaan nih lomba gk berani. "Kan sekali-sekali selama 3 tahun jadi kamu ikutan lomba di sekolah." Gitu si Ibu bilang begitu. Pertamanya aku nolak, "Ah gak bisa Bu, saya gk ngerti." Eh temen sebelahku bilang, "Pung, gw mau ah ikut coba-oba, kalo gw ikut u mau ikutan gk?" Haha, emang dasar plin plan dan gampang terhasut, yadeh akhirnya kita bolos pelajaran terakhir yaitu pelajaran matematika yang susah itu, buat ikut tekmit siang itu juga. Parah ya tuh lomba mendadak banget.

Nah, kita ber5 kalo gk salah naek taxi dibayarin si Ibu, ke tempat tekmitnya, rada jauh sih, hehe, daerah Menteng sana kalo gk salah inget. hehe. sampe disana, yang aku inget tuh kita dapet makanan haha, dapet kue dan minuman. nah itu makanan cepet bener aku abisinnya. ternyata yang ikut lomba gk banyak2 amat, jadi cuma sedikit pesertanya. Aku ikutnya lomba menulis artikel ekonomi kreatif. Jadi ada 3 subtemanya gitu, ada "Bangga produk dalam negeri", "Wirausaha", sama satu lagi lupa, hehe. aku pilih yang bangga produk dalam negeri dong. paling gampang kayanya. dan deadline nya itu masih rada jauh, tapi aku musti buat jauh2 hari buat di koreksi sama si Ibu.

Tantangan2 nya, itu tuh lagi TO, kedua aku dan temen ku itu selse nya mepet, buatnya sih ud jauh-jauh hari, tapi kaga selesai2 juga gk ada ide. hehe. Dan lomba bgitu tuh ribet, musti minta tanda tangan kepala sekolah, ttd guru pendamping gitu deh. kan seharusnya guru pendampingnya tuh Ibu Guru BI, tapi karena berhubung itu hari sabtu dan sekolah libur dan rumahnya di Bekasi ato Bogor? lupa, kan jauh tuh, akhirnya cari alternaitf lain, mau minta sama guru ekop, nah dasar si ibu kaya gk seneng ato gk mau gitu, si guru itu menolak, dan akhirnya minta sama guru matematik. gk nyambung kan? haha, emang. jadinya aku ke gereja si Bapak matematika pas esok harinya, jauh-jauh demi tandatangan nya. ya ampuun. oiya mana ke rumah kepala sekolah juga buat minta ttd, nah itulah perjuangankuu. udah hopeless? bangett..

Dan pengumpulan artikel tuh dibatesin, kira2 maks 2 lembar ato halaman ya? gk bisa bedain, tapi aku ampe 4, nah belom sempet di edit musti dikirim. Nah loh, gawat kan. terus mana ribet musti gabung2 sama artikel temen. Padahal tuh artikel aku kalo dipikir2 ya udah gagal dong, diluar syarat. Eh untungny si Ibu penerima artikel bae, katanya gapapa lah. :) lega

Nah inilah isi artikel kuu. hehe, yang ud dilombakan :)

Mengayuh Perahu Impian Menggapai yang Pasti

Sebagai negara yang kaya akan kreasi, budaya dan alamnya, adalah sebuah keharusan bagi setiap bangsa untuk menunjukan kebanggaannya. Namun sayangnya Bangsa Indonesia belum dapat mempraktikan rasa kebanggaannya secara utuh, terutama akan produknya sendiri. Apakah karena produk yang dihasilkan oleh produsen dalam negeri belum gencar memproduksi produk baru yang lebih menarik, yang dapat bersaing dalam pasar dalam negeri? Mungkin ya, sebagian rakyat membeli atau mengkonsumsi produk dalam negeri karena harganya yang lebih murah, sehingga mudah dijangkau. Namun, apakah itu yang disebut kebanggaan? Tentu saja bukan.
Padahal saya yakin, didalam benak kita masing-masing, kita sebagai masyarakat Indonesa bercita-cita untuk bersuara, ”Kami bangga dengan Indonesia. Karenanya kami bersatu bersama-sama melakukan yang terbaik untuk Indonesia.” Oleh karena itulah saya membuat artikel ini, supaya masyarakat Indonesia, khususnya kaum muda Indonesia yang tergerak mewujudkan cita-cita bersama, namun belum mengetahui bagaimana cara untuk mewujudkannya bisa menemukan suatu cara yang nantinya akan membawa negeri kita menuju hari depan yang lebih cerah.
Ada sebuah cara untuk mengubah nasib negara Indonesia, yaitu dengan mewujudkan ekonomi kreatif. Mungkin hanya sebagian kecil dari masyarakat yang tahu apa itu ekonomi kreatif, dan sayangnya hanya sebagian kecil dari mereka yang tahu yang menyumbangkan kreasinya dalam ekonomi Indonesia, yang secara langsung dapat menumbuhkan rasa bangga terhadap tanah air kita sendiri.
Menurut John Howkins dalam The Creative Economy: How People Make Money From Ideas, ekonomi kreatif diartikan sebagai segala kegiatan ekonomi yang menjadikan kreativitas (kekayaan intelektual), budaya dan warisan budaya maupun lingkungan sebagai tumpuan masa depan. Mewujudkan ekonomi kreatif artinya mewujudkan industri kreatif. Sedangkan industri kreatif itu sendiri merupakan industri original yang mengutamakan nilai kreativitas, skill, bakat dan memiliki potensi untuk pendirian lapangan pekerjaan. Ya, ekonomi kreatif pada negara-negara maju seperti Inggris dan Singapura mampu bersaing dengan sektor pertanian, industri, dan informasi.
Bentuk dari penerapan ekonomi kreatif tidak hanya terbatas pada pembuatan produk untuk diperdagangkan. Ekonomi kreatif juga dapat diterapkan pada bidang seni, perfilman, periklanan, penerbitan dan percetakan, arsitektur, desain, televisi/radio dan lain sebagainya. Semuanya itu merupakan subsektor dari ekonomi kreatif itu sendiri.
Saya yakin didalam diri rakyat Indonesia, mereka yakin mereka mempunyai bakat dan potensi yang sangat baik, mereka adalah orang-orang yang kreatif, mereka menciptakan ide yang brilian, mereka dapat menghasilkan karya yang luar biasa, dan mereka sanggup untuk bersaing didalam dunia perdagangan. Sayangnya, sebagian dari mereka belum berani menunjukan karya untuk bersaing dengan produk-produk luar.
Ada banyak manfaat dibalik pelaksanaan ekonomi kreatif. Selain bertujuan menciptakan rasa bangga akan produk sendiri, pewujudan dari ekonomi kreatif mampu mengurangi tingkat kemiskinan, mengurangi ketergantungan yang berlebihan dengan negara lain, serta yang terutama adalah mengembangkan dan membangun perekonomian di negara kita yang kemudian akan menambah pendapatan nasional. Setiap negara pastinya sanggup menjadikan ekonomi kreatif sebagai aspek penambah pendapatan nasional, maka saya pun menyadari bahwa negara kita mempunyai peluang yang sama untuk mengwujudkan pembangunan ekonomi nasional.
Dari hal yang telah saya paparkan sebelumnya, saya sadar tidaklah sesederhana itu untuk merealisasikan produk ekonomi kreatif yang kita dambakan melalui industri kreatif. Menurut saya ada beberapa hambatan dalam mewujudnyatakan ekonomi kreatif, yang pertama adalah minimnya sosialisasi ekonomi kreatif. Beberapa upaya untuk mengatasi tantangan tersebut adalah dengan mengadakan seminar khususnya untuk kaum muda Indonesia, penerbitan buku-buku yang terkait dengan ekonomi kreatif, ataupun melalui penyelenggaraan lomba menulis artikel tentang ekonomi kreatif.
Tantangan yang kedua adalah kurangnya sarana dan prasarana yang mendukung pelaksanaan industri kreatif. Untuk mewujudkan ekonomi kreatif tentunya diperlukan kreativitas. Seperti yang kita ketahui, kreativitas tidak dapat muncul dengan sendirinya. Mungkin saja kreativitas itu muncul dari bakat alamiah seseorang, namun hal seperti itu sangat jarang terjadi. Oleh karena itu, diperlukan usaha dari pemerintah untuk menyediakan sarana prasarana untuk mengembangkan kreativitas kaum muda Indonesia. Misalnya dengan diadakannya kursus kesenian dan keterampilan yang dapat membangkitkan jiwa kreativitas. Kursus tersebut dapat berupa kursus melukis, kursus kerajinan tangan, kursus komputer, kursus menjahit, kursus desain, maupun kursus tari. Kursus tersebut dapat pula membantu kaum muda yang tidak menyadari kepintaran dan bakatnya. Maka itu tujuan akhir didirikannya kursus-kursus antar lain supaya para kaum muda dapat menuangkan segala macam ide kreatif yang sebenarnya sudah ada didalam pikirannya, namun belum direalisasikan dalam bentuk nyata. Dengan kata lain, jika rakyat Indonesia secara khusus mengembangkan dan memanfaatkan setiap potensi dalam dirinya, saya yakin bangsa Indonesia yang penuh dengan ide-ide brilian mampu membangun bangsa Indonesia ke arah yang lebih baik lagi.
Tantangan ketiga adalah daya saing produk kita yang masih rendah, baik di pasar domestik maupun internasional. Untuk menciptakan daya saing, ekonomi kreatif yang saya harapkan bukan sekedar sebuah kreasi yang desain luarnya menarik, karena semua negara mampu menciptakan industri kreatif yang seperti itu. Tetapi dibalik kreasi desain luarnya, hasil ekonomi kreatif didalamnya mengandung suatu nilai yang lebih. Saya ambil contoh sepatu corak batik, selain menampilkan produk baru yang unik, tetapi juga menimbulkan rasa bangga terhadap batik sebagai budaya asli Indonesia. Saya juga menyarankan agar produk kreatif yang dihasilkan oleh kaum muda memiliki lebih dari satu kegunaan (multifungsi). Apabila kaum muda Indonesia dapat menghasilkan produk seperti itu, tentu produk asli Indonesia dapat bersaing di kancah perdagangan lokal maupun mancanegara.
Tantangan keempat adalah hasil karya dari ekonomi kreatif belum dipatenkan dan dipublikasikan. Walaupun kreativitas tersebut sudah diwujudkan dalam bentuk nyata, tetapi itu belum cukup jika belum dipatenkan dan dipublikasikan ke masyarakat luas. Hasil karya tersebut belum dapat memberikan pengaruh berarti pada sektor ekonomi negara. Oleh karenanya, hal selanjtnya yang harus dilakukan oleh pemerintah adalah mempatenkan dan mempublikasikannya. Ada berbagai cara untuk mempublikasikan hasil karya, misalnya dengan mengiklankannya di televisi, radio, koran/majalah, spanduk, brosur, internet, dan berbagai media lainnya. Hal ini bukanlah sebuah hal yang sepele karena kita dapat menggunakan media tersebut untuk memasarkan karya kreatif kita. Selain menggunakan media yang telah saya sebutkan, pemerintah maupun pihak swasta juga dapat mengadakan pameran dibidang ekonomi kreatif yang secara khusus memamerkan hasil karya kaum muda. Pameran yang diadakan janganlah hanya di tempat khusus seperti galeri seni, karena hanya sedikit orang mau mendatangi galeri seni khusus untuk melihat karya seni. Hal ini dikarenakan masih rendahnya penghargaan terhadap dunia seni. Pameran ekonomi kreatif tersebut dapat juga dilaksanakan di tempat ramai seperti mal, universitas, sekolah menengah atas, dan tempat-tempat tertentu lain yang memungkinkan adanya pameran.
Untuk menambah antusias masyarakat di bidang seni, universitas-universitas, pemerintah maupun pihak swasta lainnya dapat mengadakan lomba-lomba dibidang ekonomi kreatif. Lomba-lomba tersebut diharapkan dapat meningkatkan rasa penghargaan masyarakat akan hasil karya bangsa khususnya dibidang ekonomi kreatif. Lomba-lomba tersebut dapat pula menjadi ukuran untuk mengetahui seberapa besar tingkat kreativitas kaum muda Indonesia.
Ya, dalam pelaksanaan industri kreatif pasti selalu ada tantangan, tetapi saya yakin Indonesia mampu mengatasi tantangan-tantangan tersebut. Jika sebagian besar rakyat tergerak untuk menghasilkan beberapa industri kreatif, maka hasil produksi akan tersebar luas dan rakyat yang belum menghasilkan produk kreatif dapat ikut berkarya. Pada akhirnya, seiring berjalannya waktu rakyat Indonesia akan semakin bangga akan produk tanah airnya sendiri.
Saya menyadari setiap kita mempunyai impian-impian tersendiri. Untuk mewujudkannya, kita berusaha menentukan jalan hidup kita sendiri. Begitu pula dengan mewujudkan impian negara kita. Kita tahu apa yang kita ingin wujudkan, dan sekarang saat untuk memulainya. Dengan mengayuh maju, kita mampu mengedepankan perahu. Dengan selangkah maju, kita mampu mengubah bangsa. Mulailah berkarya, mulailah mencintai dan bangga atas karya kita sendiri, dan mulailah membangun negeri kita bersama!

T.T broken heart (and also broken english)

2009-08-27T07:44:00.001-07:00

I like someone.. :D :D haha, we are not best friend, not be friend too..
Just remember his face and i can smile..

But... We are so far, we are so so soo really2 far..
Our world isn't same..
"Just say hi and try to smile," that's only i can do..
I don't know "who" he like, but i know she's not me..

I'm just be down and don't want to see him with "her"..
Try to smilee when i see them together..

But i think i can't, so hard, so sad.. T.T
maybe he like "her" and "she" like him, too..
So, what can i do now?
Nothing, just can prepare my heart to be sick..

I don't want to meet him tomorrow, see him make me stress and know i can't to be close with him..

I don't want to meet "her", it's hard to let her with him (broken english?).. I don't want to get exkul (i'm lazy to play basketball, now)..

Buutt, this is life.. A simple life, it's not so useful just to thinking of him, right? (i say that cause i'm just try to make me happier, hahaha)..

But, my friend "Aurel", said: "we must try to get that love, cause love can't come to us without our effort".. I think it's right..
However, i can't lie my self..
I know what the results if i decide to still trying to reach that love..
Sick.. Be sick.. So my heart must defend from that sickness.. So hard..!

I try to smile at school tomorrow, and i hope i get a happiness (just a happiness) tomorrow.. :)

:) thank you for my belonging friends, for your encourages, all of them make me still hope to stepping to get my dream..

:) thank you

For my dear friend- today august 14-

2009-08-13T14:35:00.000-07:00

To: -marinaa
-jeffrey

"h a p p y b i r t h d a y"

may your dreams come true

thx 4 being my friends

god bless u

today is wonderful, cause today is friday.. :D :D asik!

Small-big-bigger-biggest

2009-08-12T03:51:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow i am going to have a history's exam.. T.T yes, i must to study. But i am a bit lazy to study it. Unfortunately, i must. Wish me luck.

I think all of this day, what happened in this day, i must thankful about that:
-a boring day during at school (specially when art lesson). And i must smile every day to start the day.

If i am not "she or he" with a wonderful brain I can think that God tell me that nothing can you get without your effort (effort = usaha, bukan?)

because i'm still really happy if i don't get any illness that can make life disastrously. I have one brain. One body. Two eyes. Two ears. Two hands with ten fingers. Oh. Can you imagine how can you life without your hands or feet. Or you get more from God? Three hands or two heads?
Maybe people will call you alien.

But i got it. I still normal. I still can sleep in a bedroom with a air conditioner, with a bed, study with a light, play internet using my handphone.. Yes, actually i don't have a BB, don't have internet in my house, no diesel when my light is suddenly off, or anything else that is luxurious.
I just want to be what i am supposed to. Supposed to be like this. What are the useful of a great money if i'm not happy.

I want to smile more. Study to regret people who get no more luck, as i have now.

And also i must regret my history teacher now. I must study now. Hehehe.. :D

-Fix my self-

2009-08-10T08:11:00.001-07:00

If people ask me, what is my dream?
I just can be silent, and smile, "i don't know"

thinking and thinking.. Which things that i can do?
Playing piano: no
eating: yes
smiling every time: no
ask God why "i am just like this": yes

however, at G.I, i saw a person which a female, very short, but is old (maybe 30 or 40), she walked with her friend..
(you know what i mean)

i ask God why you give her a bad physical like that?
Maybe you have a great plan with her? But what is that?

I have listened from my friend, he told me that God loves that people more than us. They have big problems with their body or physic, nobody likes or loves them, but God does it.

I am not like that person, but maybe her heart is mooorree kind than me.
Maybe i am worse than her.

God is so kind.. Right?
He loves everyone. That person, you, and also me.

But i can't accept my self. I am wondering why God, You give me a life like this.

But. If i see a child who sings everyday at the side of the street, just to get a little of rice. But me? Not. I'm just wait my parents give me money and then maybe i often wastes it immediately. Really crazy, yes, this is me. Have a totally great life, but still feel i'm not the lucky one.

Taken from my diary, hehe..

2009-08-07T05:53:00.001-07:00

If i am rich:
aku bukan aku yg mau mengalah

if i am beautiful:
aku bukan aku yg menghargai orang yg kurang fisiknya

if i have father who understand me:
aku bukan aku yg bersujud kpd Tuhan ketika aku tertekan

if i have a very great house with many facilities:
aku bukan aku yg mengerti sulitnya mendpt tmpt tggal

if i have expensive car:
aku bukan aku yg mandiri krn aku selalu diantar

if i have quiet mother:
aku bukan aku yg pny byk pgalaman

if i stay at peace home:
aku bukan aku yg than uji

if i am tall:
aku bukan aku yg tbah saat diejek

if i am be "lovely child" for my parents:
aku bukan aku yg belajar menerima ketidakadilan

if i am always be the "number one":
aku bukan aku yg prnah disakiti dan dibuang

if i am very smart:
aku bukan aku yg mw berusaha mnjd pntar walau dgn byk kegagalan

if i can choose which family i want to stay:
aku bukan aku yg brusaha sbar mnunggu rencana Tuhan dlm hdup ini

if i am perfect:
aku bukan aku yg btuh kasih dan belas Tuhan

if i am immortal:
aku bukan aku yg berhak mghargai stiap dtik khdupan

if i can setting my life:
aku bukan aku yg mau menunggu rancangn indah Tuhan bwtku

if God have already taken my life:
aku bukan aku yg bisa melihat btapa brharga hidup yg begitu sgkt, saat ini..

-gbu-

Here am i or here i am..

2009-08-06T04:46:00.000-07:00

When you open www.dewaklasik.com, and read the amazing article, believe that you will know "the meaning of your life.."

i like read the most article of dewa, that's make me know what the power of God..

Life is absolutely simple, and it's no use to "broke" it with useless things..

Dewa is same like us, a young man.. A clever man, and a rich man..
Yes!

But, now he is poor, but his heart is really rich.. And i like his job..

What job? Maybe you think "a best job"? Yes, because he got a chance to school in london (oxford university, how's cool?), his high intellegent so he could finished his senior highschool at 15.. (waw, i'm 16, and still be a student),
great, right?
But, he wasn't comfort in london, so he came back to indonesia and "leave his school" because he relized that God wants to make him to be "God equipment"..

It's enough today.. It's hard to klik the hp's keypad, hehe.. It's so loong and many.. :D
hehe..
If you want to know more, don't forget to open the website.. Ok? :D

Now i'm listening "H0ME" Michael bubble.. How's great?

2009-06-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

Oh, God.. I get IPS class..
Thx for result yesterday.. Hehe.. :D
thx for my friends who always care and love me..
Ooh..
First, i'm just wondering that You gives me the way like that??

I'm know now You are here, here with me, with all my journeys..
Amiin.. :D
give me smile, to pass my day, now and forever..
Amiin.. :D

Oh, why?

2009-06-05T08:57:00.001-07:00

Why my life is very complicated? Fiuh.. T.T

i never think that i can have a feeling like that? Why? All the day is just for waiting and waiting something happens with my handphone! Oh, see? How crazy i am.. T.T

Why? I never think i can waiting so long, seeing then waiting.. Is there any useful thing that i can do? Huh.. T.T

but, where is his respect of all things that i do? Just make me really like a little girl, that only can gloomy all the day? Why?

I'm just need "a normally posture", is he realize it?
Oh, come on!
I'm tired cause feel like that again and again..

Oh, ow?

2009-06-04T18:27:00.000-07:00

I woke up early this morning.. Just for do a little thing but is brilliant for her..
Hehe, now i'am at GM PLAZA, waiting, and drinking my MILO, huh, it's very expensive, its cost 9900 rupiahs.. I'm so wonder, why is MILO very expensive.. Oh, ow.. I'm suprised, but, i must buy it, cause i can't do nothing here.. I walked and walked and now i'm really happy cause i can sit here, with my MILO, although i'm alone here..
Huam.. I'm really sleepy..
Where are you??

Everything changes, but i must defend..

2009-06-04T03:13:00.001-07:00

I'm comeback here..

There are a lot of things that change in your life, but you must still defend to pass it..

Let's see..
If you have classmates, that you think they are your friends, but they make you down and stress too much.. So? What will you do? Will you still smile and say "i'm ok with all your words"..

If your friend, i mean best friend (a long time ago) never talk to you again, but only ask you a question that you think that's not important.. Cause, why? Your friend just asks only for her/his need.. Can you still answered it and then smile?

If you in the yard, and the time is for sport lesson, and you like the lesson so much, cause that day is a time to playing basketball with your team.. Of course free team, so? What is the lack? But, of course, your two "friend's" teams want to play that time, so? Your team is never have a change to play.. Cause what? The answer is they never ask your team to play.. Maybe they don't like, maybe they think you are not important to get the change to feel how play basketball in the yard when the sport lesson take play.. Are you a part of your class? The motto of your class is ALL FOR ONE! But? There are something which show you, where is the 'all for one' meant? It's vain..

When you have a friend, but almost of your classmate don't like her.. What will you do? Are you praying to God, hoping God will change your friend like everybody wants? Or do you still want to be your friend's friend? When you are alone, she is there, with you.. When you are crying, she accompanies you, and gives you time to share your problems.. When you are hungry and you don't have anybody to rent you a little their money, your friend gives you a bread.. When you are smilling together with her, she said that you're cute.. When you are down, she says a braving words just to make you get your spirit again.. But, do you really want leave her alone? Because she don't have another friend except you.. Will you leave her because nobody like her?

Right, where are the true and the fair way? Are they miss in this world? I don't know where they are.. Do you know where? :D

How can we still hoping to be friend with 'them'? The truth is i want to be friend with them, but, there are too much differences.. I don't hope it..

Although everybody doesn't like my friends and me, i'm still stay with my heart ways..
So? I just try to open my eyes and my heart every time, choose the right and do it..

:D -koe-

HEHE..

2009-06-03T02:53:00.000-07:00

hehe.. :p
bahagianya bisa selese ulangan umum, hehe.. :D
kayaknya beban nya udah ilang, hehe,,
tapi tinggal tunggu naek kelasnya...
hoho..
liburan rencananya apa aja ya?
hehe.. jalan2, beresin kamar, hehe, makan-makan biar tambah gendut, hehe, ato tidur.. wkwk..haha,..
i like holiday so much, hope that never ends ^^

Huh.. T.T

2009-04-11T05:42:00.000-07:00

Hehe.. There are hard things that i must pass, today.. Not angry, not sad, so i don't loss the meaning of this day, right? The first time, i want use english, hehe, to write my blog, of course my 1st blog too.. :D
i hope a strength, a power, a confident to choose the right ways..
The end of my blog, i just hope this is not only my last writing.. Ok! :D